Christmas Day, the lead up to it, Lionel and the turkey.

These photos might look peaceful, but . . .

On the 44 degree Friday before Christmas, our air-conditioning decided to go on strike. Finding a service expert to attend between 23 and 24 December was impossible – almost.

One company agreed to visit between 8 a.m. and 12 noon on Christmas Eve. Phew.

7.00 a.m. Christmas Eve – Cake was made, tree was decorated and gifts wrapped

even the table was set

7.10 a.m. I was reading How to Cook a Turkey Buffet in preparation for the task. It’s important to note here that I do not have a good track record with turkeys. My last attempt involved calling a chef at the Grand Hyatt at 2.00 a.m.  one Christmas Day, seeking turkey advice!

7.15 a.m. Phone call from son. ‘Mum, what are you doing today?’

It turned out that Lionel (miniature dachshund) had been stung by a bee. Lionel needed watching. Last bee sting involved much stress for all – not to mention stress for Lionel.

7.30 a.m. Lionel was delivered. Turkey instruction reading put on hold. Made stuffing instead.

8.00 – 9.00 a.m. A few puddles on carpet and floor and one vomit, otherwise Lionel was fine. No vet visit necessary.

9.00 a.m. Air-con repair men arrived. Lionel objected strongly to their presence. Lionel held back from attack!

9.30 a.m. Problem identified. Two geckos in condenser. One dead. One alive. Did I want to see? No thanks.

10.00 a.m. Quote for new air-con and condenser. Lionel still not happy – nor was I. Decided to wait until 2020, especially given there are so many people with much larger worries.

10.30 a.m. Repair men, who did not repair, departed. Lionel left another protest-puddle on the front mat, to show his displeasure.

11.00 a.m. I faced the turkey. Lionel very interested. Lionel took up position under my feet, ready for any morsel that might fall.

11.00 a.m. – 11.30 a.m. I followed all recipe, internet and well-meaning-friend advice, BUT turkey would not part with its neck. (I need to point out here that I’m an almost vegetarian. I knew it was dead – of course, but I wasn’t doing well.)

11.45 a.m. Neighbour dropped in to borrow baking tray.

11.45 a.m. – 12 noon Neighbour attempted removal of said neck. No success. Apologies. Neighbour left.

12.00 noon Sister arrived. We both pulled and pulled and pulled. Garden secateurs were located and sterilised. (Lionel incredibly interested.)

12.10 Success.  12.15 Sister left. 12.20 Turkey went into oven.

Suffice to say, we all had a wonderful day, the turkey not so much, but it was served and eaten for Christmas Day, Christmas night and Boxing Day and yes, there was even some for Lionel.

For me, it’s the last turkey I’ll ever cook!



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  1. Gaye My dad "captured" a turkey many moons ago after delivering a "person" to his burial in the country. After tying it's legs with a ribbon from a wreath in the hearse, brought it home and put with the chickens. Come Xmas time and dad did the "usual thing", mum plucked, it was discovered the said turkey wouldn't fit in mum and dad's oven. They had to call on neighbours to cook it and everyone had turkey and veg etc at mum and dad's. That would have been maybe 70 years ago. I think that was the last time the family had turkey as well.
    December 27, 2019 at 6:11 pm · Reply
    • corinne Ha, that's certainly a great turkey story Gaye. Hope your Christmas was beautiful and very best wishes for the new year. Hopefully see you soon. x
      December 27, 2019 at 8:36 pm · Reply
  2. Laraine That's quite a story - and I love the pic of Lionel ?
    December 28, 2019 at 9:46 pm · Reply

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